Thursday, May 22, 2014

preparing for birth.


I hit seven months last week and was in a slight state of shock to realize that I'm almost done with this pregnancy! It's funny how pregnancy, just like life, ebbs and flows so much. The first trimester, I thought I was going to D-I-E. The sickness was 24/7 and I finally succumbed to taking a combination of Unisom and B6 approved by my midwife, which took the edge off until it all subsided around 17 weeks. Since then, I've felt healthy, energetic (within reason) and have enjoyed feeling the life inside my belly get stronger and more active.

Having a singleton pregnancy is way different than a twin pregnancy, in my experience. There have been many times when I've felt that something must be wrong because the baby wasn't moving around as much. Then I remembered that I had two babies inside me last time, and someone was always awake, always jabbing or kicking or rolling. This one is nice and quiet. I'm also measuring right on schedule instead of 3-4 weeks ahead. When I went into labor five weeks early with the girls, I was already measuring at 43 weeks. Gah.

We're also doing our birth differently. At home! I don't want to set foot inside another hospital to birth a child (knock on all the wood all around me) because it was a long saga last time and very stressful. Preterm labor at 31 weeks, mag sulfate for a week, two weeks at the hospital on bedrest, then five days home and my water breaking, then two weeks in the NICU. I watched the birth video a couple of weeks ago for the first time and just cried. It was as great of a birth as I could have hoped for given the circumstances, but seeing Ruthie come out just stunned, looking at the bright lights....

Ok, I have to stop writing about it because I'm crying again. It's also why I haven't finished writing the birth story on this blog. It just makes me cry too much.

Yes, we'll do a hospital birth plan/transfer plan just in case, but fortunately our midwife is also a teaching nurse practitioner at one of the big hospitals here in town and has privileges, so we'll be in good hands either way.

But my hope is that this birth will be a bit of redemption. Quiet. Family-oriented. No drama. Tears of joy instead of tears of disappointment and sadness to see my littles in a small plastic box instead of in my arms. A baby ready to come into the world and a mama and family so very ready to receive him or her (we're gonna be surprised!)

But please, oh please, no drama.

 

2 comments:

  1. Oh, redemptive birth! I know the exact feeling. You and baby and everything surrounding your birth will be in my prayers :)

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  2. thank you friend! So appreciate your thoughts and prayers :)

    ReplyDelete

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